Maximum Happiness!

the final match of hockey in my life is over. and im proud to say we fought hard. real hard. being one goal down seems like a dejavu- of a dream i had last year, on the exact same date. but that's a lie. because this year it was different. last year we gave up and pretty much sank in our shoes the moment one goal was conceded. this year, nothing stopped us. we had possession most of the time. we didnt break or buckle after that one goal. every one of us on pitch held fast to the hope that we would claim it back. that we could. and we fought real hard. even the people in the stands could tell. we didnt think of giving up, not for one moment. we just lacked the finish. 3 attacking shortcorners, and zero conceded. that's a feat. 75% of the time in their half. that's a feat. sarah saved a 1v1 hit against her. that's amazing. our pressure on them was intense. so much so their final cry when the whistle blew was one of relief. RELIEF. not cold complacency. and im speaking the truth. not exaggerating because im bitter or upset or regretful. no hard feelings. because there was not one more thing we could have done. sure, there were mistakes here and there, but we worked hard to reclaim them. and the fighting spirit which we lacked in the beginning, it was HERE today. in every single one of us. sir is proud of us. surely.

when the whistle blew, the whole team was surprised. we were in the Zone. adrenaline rush pumping us forward. no exhaust. no mental lapse. just 120% all out intense sweat, effort and strength. as i walked toward the bench, i was all calm. no sadness, no tears, no angst, no bitterness. we lose like champions. because as a team, we have achieved the most in each of us. all this sounds cliche. but you have to be a sportsperson to realise it is true. all the 'you can do it' 'play your game' mantras, they are true. Hockey is not just a game. it taught me about Respect. about Sacrifice. about Calm Confidence. about Maximum Happiness. about Being Perfect.

We Are Perfect. i've never been so happy being second. im so proud of US.
as i stepped into the shed, Sir said 'you played well feli.'
'..but i couldnt send out the 16-yards.'
'doesn't matter. you played well.'

tackles, sweeps, channeling. it hasnt sunk in that my hockey stick will henceforth be unused. i dont want this to end. it means too much to me.

i cant stand supporters who go there to pick out the flaws in your game and dig their nails deeper into your raw sores. they are no friend. they just happen to be dad, bro and jac. i guess. they mean. well.